So, for the past decade or so, but especially the past couple of months, I've been suffering from hardcore mental anguish. Just struggling internally, like, all the time. These feelings were oppressive and relentless and I didn't know what I was going to do...until today when I bought Uno Mod, the sleek 21st century version of the classic multi-colored, Spanish-language card game.


You see, I used to have the crappy, archaic version of Uno but was always super depressed whenever I played the game or even just looked at/thought about the stack of cards. "This shit is not smooth as ice," I'd say to myself dejectedly. Those cards were totally incompatible with my way of life and it was stressing me out. But then I went to Target today, saw Uno Mod, and was like, "yes! Finally, there's a version of Uno that fits my lifestyle!" Already, my anxiety has melted away and I just can't stop thinking about how red hot this new Uno case is going to look on the living room table. Or maybe I'll buy a display case for it. I don't know, I haven't decided yet.